I've been awake since 12:30a. It is now 4:00 and I will have to get up in a couple of hours. I dozed off a few minutes ago, and I dreamt of him. I was on the phone with my sister when he came walking through the door. As if he was getting home from a long day of work. I was looking at him in amazement and asking my sister was I dreaming. She never did answer my question. I began to ask him for forgiveness because if it were a dream, I needed his forgiveness before I woke up. He told me he couldn't forgive me. I began to cry harder and harder and beg more feverently. I needed him to just say yes so I can forgive myself. I messed up when it came to him. I destroyed something so beautiful and can never take it back. He never forgave me in the dream, and I woke up and cried.
